Yesterday I went to one of old colleague home. We wanted to visit them from a long time since had last met them in May 2022. So finally, after long time, yesterday we could make that happen. He is basically from north only. During conversations found that there are lot of things common even in thought process also. He is from UP and I am from Rajasthan. However we could see that lot of things we could relate to each other.
Like we started discussing on how in north show off is there in lot things while in south people are very simple, don’t just do things to show people. One example on was how marriages happen in north and south. In marriage arrangements lot of money spent in north. Different types of clothes for each of the ceremony, different varieties of food items on different days. Marriage functions would start few days before only. Until marriage day, lot of functions would be there. For these functions, grand arrangements happen. Hence lot of money spent happens.
Then there would be a time post marriage to judge people based on their gifts. Whoever brought costly gift or gave some good amounts are good people, are near and dear ones. Who gave not so costly gifts are good for nothing. So, the whole definition of near and dear ones is based on the cost of the gift. It does not matter what relationship you have with them.
Also, the way marriages happen in south is like arrangement are limited and money would be spent on more important things like gold jewelry and property. Here money would not be wasted too much on food or other things. Even after that also, food would be good. In south weddings also, there would be many varieties of food, but food is simple. Where in north there would be multiple types of curries, sweets, breads, side dishes would be there in cuisine, so idea is how many dishes are there in lunch/dinner. It’s all about the number. If somebody had 20 dishes in their wedding lunch/dinner menu, we would have more than that. Now it would be obviously cost more but as it a kind of question of prestige so there would not be any compromise on the number, though need to borrow money to make this arrangement.
I think this way food in south is way simpler and more straightforward. I am not saying people would not do comparison here, but still marriages are much less expensive than in north. Also, we were discussing what people do to get attention. Like people are there on various WhatsApp groups. Now on birthdays and anniversary if nobody is wishing, people themselves would message that it is my birthday or anniversary, please bless me with your wishes.
If sometime fall sick, same way would message and tell people that bless me with your wishes so I will get well soon. Idea is to tell people about each thing which is happening in your life, get their attention, be in limelight. Be there in people’s memory, keep reminding them that you exist. People should not forget you, should talk about you. In comparison to south, attention seeking is more in north.